JAMAICAN 58TH INDEPENDENCE DAY 2020

Outfit

T-shirt - Designed by me

Slouchy Jeans - Zara

Blazer - Zara

Shoes - Zara (old)

Reeeeehhhhhh! Big up yuhself! 

Hi everyone! It's Jamaican independence day, we are easing out of lockdown, the shops are gradually opening again, and we are slowly adapting to a new way of life for the foreseeable future. Although massive annual events that are a pivotal part of Caribbean culture such as the 'Nottinghill Carnival' have been cancelled; one thing for sure is, you can never kill the spirit of Jamaican people, no matter if you were born there or if you are British Jamaican like myself, we are typically boasty, bubbly, PROUD of our heritage and we tend to LOVE bright colours (in particular yellow). 

What is there not to love about the island where the beautiful clear blue water runs free and food grows on the trees - literally. There is a saying in Jamaica that goes: 'Wi lickle but wi tallawah!' This basically means that we may be small, but we are strong and courageous so do not underestimate us. We have amazing food (as you can see listed on my t-shirt below) the national dish is akee and salt fish, amazing people such as: The Marleys, the fastest man in the world Usain Bolt, the fastest woman in the world 'Shelly Ann - Fraser Pryce, hilarious comedians like Oliver Samuels who I have watched growing up, and of course political activist, journalist and entrepreneur Marcus Garvey whose legacy inspires millions of people today whilst we still advocate and campaign for change for black people. Not forgetting the chilled and relaxed sounds of reggae and gospel music which constantly fills the atmosphere in my house, from Chevelle Franklin, Beres Hammond, Luciano, Stichie, Chronixx and Buju Banton while my mom or myself cooks up dinner; being raised in a Jamaican household is something I wouldn't trade for anything.

Jamaican people have contributed so much to British society, from helping to build up the NHS and national rail with their most skilled workers who migrated to England during the Windrush era, to fighting in the war, to facing racism and rejection, to being spat at and turned away from getting mortgages, being beaten in the streets for no reason and unfairly targeted by police - British society has not been kind to Caribbean people. Jamaicans and Caribbeans showed so much strength and resilience coming to a country they knew nothing about to create a new life, they got on with it and pushed through all of that racism to give us better - our grandparents worked tremendously hard to give us a life with more opportunities that they did not get access to, and for that I am forever grateful.

The baton has now passed onto the younger generation for us to keep their legacy going and the Jamaican traditions and recipes alive, and that is exactly what I intend to do. My parents always say 'It's not how you start, it's how you finish', so I will be pushing myself to be the best version of myself I can be - and I will always being doing it in style with a fabulous pair of heels on whilst listening to some dancehall or reggae. 

In closing Jamaicans be proud of who you are, and whoever don't like it can gweh!

HAPPY JAMAICAN INDEPENDENCE DAY! WI LICKLE BUT WI TALLAWAH! :) XX

HOT GYAL GET MAD CAH YUH NUH REGULAR!

DOUBLE DENIM: A TRIBUTE TO MY DAD #FATHERSDAY

Outfit

Jacket - Cow Vintage

Jeans - Zara

Shoes - Public Desire

Bag - Urban Outfitters

Ah Denim, the world's most popular fabric, the most worn, its hard wearing, you can find it in virtually every style you can think of, and is worn by almost everyone. Although denim is part of my every day casual wardrobe, double denim is not a look I usually do - well I haven't been doing many looks at all lately because my go to quarantine look has been a pair of comfy leggings, a vest and a satin headscarf, however restrictions are being eased and my looks can now be dusted off and ready once again for the outside world.

On Sunday 21st June it was fathers day, and as always it was a joyous occasion in my parents house. We ordered in food from two amazing black owned businesses, we watched films and I had a flick through some old photo albums. My favourite photo ever of my dad and I is me standing on top of a car as a baby and my dad has on the most fabulous double denim look with a thin white belt.

I thought it would be cool if I re created my dad's denim outfit from that photo as my tribute to him on fathers day. I opted for these slouchy jeans from Zara and honestly they are the most comfortable pair of jeans I own. I often find jeans quite restrictive and tight, but I do literally everything is these and I have no issues, I wear these dressed up, I wear these to my styling jobs, and even paired with a bandeau or a vest and a pair of sandals, it can easily become part of a great summer look.

I wanted to put a little twist on the outfit and opted for this leopard print belt from Primark to break the denim up a little, and chose this bag from Urban outfitters that I've had for a about six years to pair it with.

I LOVE these shoes! My sister hates them with a passion, but I want them in every colour. They are so comfortable and the perfect heel height to walk around in, without worrying about if your feet are going to feel like they are being attacked by your shoes within half an hour of being worn.

The details, the details, the details are so important. When an outfit needs to be pulled together, your accessories  do that for you, when choosing accessories they don't necessarily need to match but they should compliment your outfit.

As lockdown eases be safe, wash your hands and keep being fabulous! :)

BIRMINGHAM BLACK LIVES MATTER PROTEST!: WHY PROTESTING IS IMPORTANT

I AM SO PROUD OF MY CITY BIRMINGHAM!

Out of all the things I have been a part of, this has to be the thing I am most proud of. After spending the week feeling extremely overwhelmed with emotions constantly flitting between rage and sadness about the heinous killing of George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery and Breonna Taylor, it felt so electrifying to be a part of something that was much bigger than myself. We chanted, we marched, there were speeches and by the time I left I felt so empowered. When I got home after a long day, tired, voice hurting and blisters on my foot,  I decided to participate in a Zoom call where the participants were discussing the 'Black Lives Matter' movement where the question was raised 'What does protesting do and is it still necessary? We have been marching for years and nothing has changed'. I had a think about this after I came off the call and I thought, YES! Yes protesting is still necessary for different
reasons.

MARKETING

1.) Protesting is necessary because it is your marketing tool, it amplifies the message that you are trying to get out to the world, to get people to pay attention too, to evoke conversation, and to spark the catalyst that will hopefully implement change. It is no different to signing a petition, if 10,000 people sign the petition for there to be a change to the law, then parliament can give them a response, but if 100,000 people sign a petition, then it can be considered for a debate in parliament, it raises the stakes.

EMPOWERMENT

2.) Most people do not hold the same power as our iconic celebrities like Jay-Z or Beyonce who can donate hundreds of thousands of dollars to bailout funds or organisations. However what people do have is their voice. Not everyone has a loud voice and some people don't even know what to say, but some people rely on these peaceful protests in order to feel empowered to gain the courage to speak up and do what's right in their own lives going forward.

BELONGING

3.) Protesting can give you sense of belonging. Whilst I have had my family to lean on through these distressing times to talk to and cry with, other people have not. Going to a protest for some people is a learning experience and provides them with a sense of relief that they are amongst other people that are experiencing the same feelings of hurt, pain and frustration.

4.) PHYSICAL UNITY

It is about seeing a physical manifestation of unity which is important, because it forces people to acknowledge that there is an issue that they need to be concerned about, and if this many people are resisting then maybe there is a problem that needs to be fixed.

Participating in the protest yesterday made me feel so proud of Birmingham the city I am from, and how we came together to stand in solidarity for 'Black Lives Matter' and the call to end white supremacy. But it cannot end here, it cannot end at a protest, there must be actionable and tangible change made after the protest.

WHAT DO WE DO NEXT

1. SUPPORT BLACK BUSINESSES

We have so much talent within our own community and yet we constantly spend our money elsewhere. A lot of companies, brands and co-operations really don't give two shits about 'Black Lives' and if they matter, and for many of them the only language they understand is money. If we take our money out of these brands then they will realise the strength of the black pound or dollar and how much we have contributed them, for a change let's BUILD EACH OTHER UP INSTEAD.

2.) INSIDE THE WORKPLACE

Email your workplace and ask the HR department to review their policies for everyone to see, highlighting how they intend to stamp out systematic racism and how they are going to ensure equal opportunities to black staff, question them on how they intend to ensure the mental wellbeing of their staff in the workplace, are there going to be measures put in place to ensure that their black staff are not being overlooked and passed over for career progression. Is there going to be a rise of black people in senior positions.

3.) HOLD BRANDS ACCOUNTABLE

Brands who have committed to standing in solidarity with the 'Black Lives Matter' movement need to prove that they genuinely mean it, they cannot get away with performative rage, so many of them will use this to capitalise off black pain and expression, and then forget about us again in a few months, they MUST follow through. Email them and ask them what they plan to do differently regarding diversity within their companies, do they donate to black organisations what is the HR policy of dealing with racism, is diversity reflected in their brand.

4.) VOTE & WRITE TO YOUR LOCAL MP

It is extremely important to vote. Read up on your local MP and find out what they are doing for their constituents, do they speak on the issues that are important to your community when they are going to represent you in the house of parliament. Write to them and tell them the issues you are unhappy with and ask how they intend to resolve them. Vote in the general election, there is often a misconception that your vote won't count or there is no point voting, but we MUST vote, read up on the different parties and what they represent in their manifestos - it's long and boring, but it affects us so we need to be clued up. The MP for Birmingham Perry Barr is Khalid Mahmood.

5.) EDUCATE

We need to ensure that we are edifying our communities with resources and skills. We need to have those tough but healthy and necessary conversations about race with our children, we cannot avoid it because the learning starts at home. For teenagers and adults (READ, READ, READ AND READ SOME MORE!) I am saying this to myself as well. We need to know our history to know who we are and to also understand that black history did not start with slavery, and to further understand the root of white supremacy which is complex and multi layered.

Essential Reading List by Dr. Akala

6.) FINANCIAL LITERACY

I read a book called 'Rich Dad, Poor Dad' and a line that has always stood out to me is 'He who holds the money, holds the rules'. We need to teach our community and children about how to invest, how to save, reduce expenses, build credit scores and compound money.

7.) DONATE TO BLACK ORGANISATIONS

Finally whilst I know that eventually the chanting, protesting and marching will die down, and this is not going to change over night, I am confident that there is going to be a shift in the atmosphere for real change to occur. This protest movement is the biggest in HISTORY! let's not forget what kind of change we can bring about when we come together, let's keep continuing to support the movement and support black organisations who can keep advocating for change and spreading the message. Stay safe guys and be the change you want to see xx

Donate to UK Organisations

Donate to Black Minds Matter UK:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/black-minds-matter-uk?

Donate to Stop Hate UK:

https://www.stophateuk.org/fundraising/

Donate to Belly Mujinga’s family:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/rip-belly-mujinga

Donate to Show Racism the Red Card:

https://www.theredcard.org/fundraise

Donate to the Stephen Lawrence Charitable Foundation:

https://www.stephenlawrence.org.uk

Donate to Hope Not Hate:

https://www.hopenothate.org.uk/

Expanded list of UK charities that work with Black and POC communities:

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/15gBiGqIB5ViNtfl__jlER0qNNRkxX8R0GGuryMu2k4A/edit?usp=sharing

Donate to Black Lives Matter:

https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_blm_homepage_2019

Donate to Black Visions Collective:

https://www.blackvisionsmn.org/

Donate to the Movement for Black Lives:

https://m4bl.org/join-our-movement/

Donate to Campaign Zero to support policy solutions to end police brutality in America:

https://www.joincampaignzero.org/

Donate to The Bail Project:

https://bailproject.org

Donate to George Floyd Memorial Fund:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/georgefloyd

Donate to Reclaim the Block:

https://secure.everyaction.com/zae4prEeKESHBy0MKXTIcQ2

Donate to bail funds across the US:

https://secure.actblue.com/donate/bail_funds_george_floyd

WE NEED JUSTICE - BLACK LIVES MATTER!

Hi all, With everything that has been happening across the world from Covid-19 to the 'Black Lives Matter' protests  It's been a about a week since I wrote this piece below and put it out across my social media pages. Two days after the news of the George Floyd murder broke, my fiance and I had a very emotionally draining but sadly not unfamiliar conversation. How many more times would a black person have to be executed by police brutality or at the hands of racists before enough is enough? When I heard the distress and cracking in my fiance's voice, I knew I had to do something and speak up about this, I literally sat up in bed grabbed my laptop and just poured my heart out...this is what I had to say.

I've honestly just been wanting to cry for the last two days, my heart feels so heavy. It is 2020, 2020 and black people are still having to be subjected to this murderous bullshit at the hands of racist police.

ARTWORK BY: ARIEL SINHA

The Amy Cooper video in the park and the Oscar winning performance of her pretending to be attacked by a black man while she was on the phone to police made me sick to my stomach. She weaponised her tears and knew that being a white woman would allow her the privilege of being viewed as a victim despite her being the villain. My first thought was 'Thank God that man was filming!'... but can you imagine if he wasn't? The police could have brutalised that man and destroyed his life, and she KNEW IT, she knew it and she maliciously continued knowing that phone call could end his life, she was well aware that black life in the justice system is valued so little. 

When people say things like 'I don't see colour' and then chime in with examples of how they too have had 'similar experiences of being oppressed', it is a load of bullshit, and it is an attempt to erase your experiences as a black person trying to navigate your way through society, to falsely insinuate that these experiences can happen to anyone, to downplay the seriousness of the racial injustice taking place, and to suppress your right to feel outrage.

I then had to think about how many Amy Cooper experiences black people have encountered in general life and at work. Like the time my younger sister came home from her 'shiny' TV job in distress because she was minding her own business by the photocopier when a white woman walked up to her out of no where and said to her 'Do you speak in that clicky language' (Yes she said that, I can't make this up), my sister said 'Shara I literally just put my face in my hand and walked away, I didn't say anything to her at all I just walked away. The woman then proceeds TO BURST INTO TEARS and three members of the team in the office rush over to console her, and then they turn on my sister shouting 'WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HER?!' meanwhile the woman didn't own up to the fact the she was the one who had caused offence, she watched them verbally accuse my sister, cowered behind her tears and did nothing, the rest of the team then told my sister that she needed to apologise to the woman, (when my sister told me this I was furious). Very often when you are the only black person in an environment like that or in the office and the rest of the team is white and they haven't been culturally introduced to people of other races, many of them rely on their narrow media stereotypes to cast judgement (e.g 'the aggressive black woman') and frequently make throw away comments towards black people, so as a black person we are always trying to figure out how to navigate these spaces, do our work and come home in peace without feeling emotionally exhausted, over looked or dismissed by the end of the day. 

Or the time when my fiancé went to pick up his friend in Chelsea, parked his car waiting for his friend, and a white woman came out of her house, walked up to his car and said to him he needed to move his car because she doesn't want any drive by shootings happening around there (when I heard this my blood was boiling!) It didn't matter to her that my fiance is an amazing man, an engineer, a sports coach running a business with his close friends, and a son who looks after his mother and makes her beam with pride, she made a disgusting stereotypical pre judgement based on the colour of his skin. Or the time when I was at my retail job and my line manager was boasting about a black guy she was dating and then said 'I'm not sure about taking him home because I don't know how my kids will react to his black skin' (my jaw literally dropped at the fact she felt so comfortable to say this too my face, I was livid!) in an attempt to remain calm I said 'I am a black woman, you cannot date a black man and pick and choose pieces of him', her reply was 'Yes but he's not like your black he's like a dark dark...' at which point I lost it and I had to school her right then and there, she also welled up with tears (eye roll). These experiences are VERY common (and I have way more examples than this). Most of the time when black people are at work or just living life they are censoring themselves around other races for reasons like this. White women who are in the wrong but weaponise their tears against black men and women knowing it can lead to their demise or smear their character is a form of violence and I for one WILL NOT remain silent about it.

If you are not black but you 'have black friends', love dating black men, love black culture, love black food, you guys need to speak the fuck up. It's not good enough to say you are not aware, it's not good enough to turn a blind eye, you don't get to dip in and out of black culture when you feel like it. Black men are not your fetish, they are not your 'bad boys', they are not your 'big d*ck fantasies', they are not your trophies to make you look cool, they are not your hyper masculine action figures for you too objectify who can handle anything. Black women are not your stereotypes, we are not your sassy black friends, we are not all 'strong black women who can handle anything', where is the room for us to be vulnerable and breathe? Black men and women are human beings with emotions, feelings and families, who would like to live life without having to pass down generational traumas or the, 'you'll have to work twice as hard to be seen as equal' conversation to the younger generation growing up behind them. WE ARE TIRED!

Black men and women PLEASE watch your mental health at this time, it is not normal to continuously watch yourselves like lambs to the slaughter at the hands of evil racists, police and Amy Coopers of this world. For other races they get to call the police and more often than not they know things will be fine, black people always have to think twice before doing so because they don't know how it will end for them. If reading this post has made you uncomfortable - GOOD! It is time that we stop sweeping things underneath the rug pretending these issues don't exist and start being honest with each other and having these hard ugly conversations, we cannot mollycoddle the truth anymore because it may hurt someone's feelings.

And to people reading this who want to speak out against the ongoing murders of black people, but choose not too and are scared of how it will affect their jobs, their relationships with other people etc please remember the words of Desmond Tutu when he said 'If you choose to be neutral in situations of injustice, then you have chosen the side of the oppressor'. #BLACKLIVESMATTER #R.I.P #AHMAUDARBERY#GEORGEFLOYD #BREONNATAYLOR 

REST IN POWER!

...BREATHE - 10 TIPS: HOW TO TAKE A BREAK FROM COVID-19

Outfit

Playsuit - Pretty Little Thing

Sandals - Zara

Earrings - Dalston Market

And breathe. Before you read on I want you to take two mins, be still and concentrate on breathing in and out very slowly... At the moment everything feels very surreal and we are faced with a new reality that as a society feels quite scary, uncertain and that we are not used to. Covid-19 has literally turned the world upside down and claimed the lives of so many people, bankrupted businesses, job losses, created financial worry and forced all of us to isolate until the virus slows down. Now more than ever it is imperative for us to look after our mental health, many people are faced with the reality of having to be still and face themselves like they never have before. The term 'We are in this together' has never been more accurate than it is now, in this post I want to offer you ten tips to help you get through this time or at least get you through the day if you are struggling.

1.) Turn off the News and Social Media

It may sound obvious but this one can actually be quite difficult to do because literally every where you look, every time you turn on the TV and every time you go on social media you are constantly bombarded with news, conspiracy theories and images of how bad things are getting. Although I understand it is important to be in tune with what is going on, it is not healthy to consume this information all the time - you will drive yourself insane, please do not do this. If the news or social media is giving you anxiety TURN IT OFF for the day, watch something funny or read that book that you've been wanting to get started on for a while, sometimes you need to tune out and put your mental health first.

2.) Sit in the garden (If you have access to one)

Since being in quarantine I've been spending a lot more time in the garden. Being in the house all the time can feel claustrophioic, but just changing the scenery and taking a mat out
to the garden and just laying
down and looking up at the sky
and trees can completely
transform your mood and lift your
 spirits.

3.) Prayer / Meditation

Prayer is something my family and I have always done together and more so now that we are in quarantine, however I also like to pray and meditate by myself, being spiritually grounded at a time like this and connecting to God or your higher source and tapping into your faith is so important. I love to do this outside because if I am having a day where I am feeling down, then closing my eyes, breathing in and out and focusing on just what is a around me brings me back to the present moment, I am literally only paying attention to what is infront of me and realising that right now although Covid-19 has reeked havoc and 

disrupted our lives,

I have a family that loves me, 

food in the cupboard, a roof over my head, good health, and at the moment that is all that matters.

4.) Order a painting or colouring book

Aside from the being really fun and you getting to create some amazing artwork at the end of it, colouring can lower stress levels and release feelings of relief and reduce feelings of stress. If you have some paints as home, get them out and get messy, do an abstract piece, paint until your heart is content.

5.) Rediscover Old Hobbies

You know all of those things that you've always wanted to do, but never had the time to do them, well now is a good time to revisit those hobbies or passions. For me I have started blogging, filming Youtube content more regularly, I've started reading a lot more and writing. My mom is baking, my dad has taken out his keyboard and has been practising everyday, your hobbies help you to focus on other things outside of your job.

6.) Listen to music

I believe listening to music is

 good for the soul. The other day

I was feeling very overwhelmed

and anxious and I put on a song 

called 'Old Soul' by Bruno Major, then played D'Angelo 'Found My Smile Again' went straight into listening to some gospel music by Fred Hammond, and immediately my whole body just relaxed and my mind felt settled.

7.) Keep a diary / journal

Journaling is something I used to do a lot up until the age of about 21 and then stopped for a while, but since quarantine I have found writing very therapeutic. Your thoughts can often get jumbled in your mind which can cause an over load of anxiety, writing things down can help to untangle those thoughts and seeing things out of your head and down on paper can bring clarity on how to solve some issues because you can see it clearly. Other times its just about blowing off some steam and getting it out, you can either keep your journal, or if you want too you can write things down and then rip it up, what ever makes you feel better - do that.

8.) Work out at home 

This is the one that I have been doing as much as I can. Before quarantine I was in the gym at my legs bums and tums class three times a week. At first I found the adjustment very difficult because I love going to the gym not only to keep fit, but to also keep my mental health in check and keep me energised. As a freelancer when you don't have work or you have a quiet period you have to find ways to keep yourself upbeat and going to the gym is how I do that. Now what I do is after my meditation I go straight into doing workout videos that I find on Youtube and sometimes I Zoom call my friends in on a 3 way call so that we can work out together and encourage each other. 

9.) Check in with family & friends.

In times like these we must check up on each other, isolating can feel lonely but we need to remember that we are not alone, and now more than ever we need to look out for each other, a phone call or a text can make a huge difference to some one else's day and your own day.

10.) Structure your day with a goals list

For a lot of people their daily routine has been completely disrupted and they are struggling with the lack of structure and feeling useful.  If you are a person who likes routine, then set a list of goals for the day and set times of the day that you would like to complete them by e.g: 

7:00am - Mediate / Pray

7:30am - Work out / exercise

8:30am - Eat Breakfast

9:00am - Go and sit in the garden

9:40am - Read a book

11:00am - Check in with a friend 

/ family member

11:30am - Play a game

12:30 pm - Hobbies

2:30pm - Have some lunch

3:00pm - Watch a film

5:00pm - Read a book

6:00pm Watch a film

8:00pm - Have some dinner

9:00pm - Write in your Journal

This is just an example but just having a list of mini goals can make you feel accomplished or like you have something you can aim towards or focus on.

As we stay in doors the main thing I want everyone to focus on is just taking time to rest, some times we always want something to do, but we will never get this amount of time again to just be still, rest and reflect and to do some real soul searching, be comfortable in our own company, or just to relax for a while. We don't need to be productive every single day, we don't always need too put that pressure on ourselves to show the world that we have it all together and still be making 'boss moves'. This time is about YOU, so what ever YOU need to do to make yourself feel better and get through this time then do that without fear of judgement or guilt.

I hope whoever reading this has found this useful, stay safe, stay in doors, wash your hands, and remember you are FABULOUS DARLING! :) XX

IM ENGAGED!!! - VALENTINES DAY 2020

Outfit

Dress: Oh Polly

Shoes: Asos

Bag: Boohoo

Photographer: LM Visuals

OMG, OMG OMGGGG!
Ok ok calming down and breathing slowly.

Everyone! I Shara Tanasha Johnson aka princess of everything fashion and fabulous has just got engaged! Well not just, my fiancé proposed in the most beautiful way on Valentines day and to be honest I'm still really overwhelmed with it all and I keep crying with happiness.

Apparently he'd been planning this for months and had gone to my parents in December to ask them for their blessing to marry me, and then had spent ages finding the perfect ring for me. I on the other hand completely oblivious to what was being planned, accidentally nearly sabotaged the whole thing by being difficult. My boyfriend had informed me that he had planned a photoshoot for us on Valentines day, and honestly I didn't have any inclination that he would propose because we were supposed to do a photoshoot a couple of years ago.

Instead of guessing it would be a proposal I went into full fashion stylist mode two weeks before and started saying to him 'babe we need to do the shoot later in the day, why is it so early? We need hair and makeup, we need a theme, we need outfit changes, we should wear matching outfits, let me choose your outfit, I don't think you've thought about the logistics of this, why aren't you listening to me I'm a fashion stylist I know what we should be doing!' (bless my boyfriend he was doing his best to just ignore me and continue with his plans).

Then in the morning my make up wouldn't go right and I had a massive nose bleed out of nowhere and I said 'AAAHH I don't feel like going out anymore' (me just being a total drama queen and having a mini meltdown).

Eventually I was dressed and he took me to the beautiful location of 'Sky Gardens' on the 35th floor to the 'Sky Pod Bar' in central London, and I said 'oooo babe this is gorgeous!' In true Shara style I was so focused on the lovely location and us getting fabulous pictures and making sure all of our angles were right and me saying 'yaaassss' every two seconds admiring what an amazing job the photographer was doing, I didn't for one second think anything was out of the ordinary, I literally thought 'this is great! we're having fab pics taken, I will have great content for my blog' and to be honest I was already so happy that he'd planned this I wasn't thinking about anything else.

We walked along the garden landscape admiring the view and then we came across two chairs and he said to me, 'babe I think we should do an impromptu gratitude talk'. A gratitude talk / walk is something that we've done throughout our relationship, it's when we go out into a neutral space and we talk about all the things we are thankful for in each other, our relationship and all the things we would like to improve on in our relationship just so that the line of communication between us is always healthy, so again I didn't think anything was out of the ordinary because we've always done this.

I was completely shocked when I stood up to put my jacket on, I turned around and he was on one knee and said 'before we go I just want to ask you will you marry me?'
At this point I was absolutely stunned because I had no idea this was coming. I had always made it clear to him that I didn't want to get married in my twenties, and that my thirties is when I would think about marriage, but when I saw him down on one knee my whole heart just felt so full and I cried with joy because he was showing me that he loves me so much  that he wants me to be his wife and build a future with me. Through tears and blurry mascara I said 'Yes'! and he puts the most beautiful ring on my hand.

Literally every emotion was running through me at once - I was happy, nervous, overwhelmed, and he looked at me and said, this is about us, there's no rush, if it takes us 1, 2, 3 years or whatever to get married its ok, I just wanted to show you how serious my intentions are'. Honestly guys I was so happy, I feel so safe with him.  I've never wanted to feel under pressure to get married because I know how much societal pressure there is for women to be married by a certain age, but him reassuring me was all I needed and I couldn't be more thankful.

After me crying my eyes out, he turned to the crowd of people who had formed to see what was going on and said  'SHE SAID YES!', everyone clapped and was congratulating us, and we got complimentary glasses of champagne.

Whilst I know that we have a lot to plan and a wedding to plan, right now I'm just enjoying this stage of being engaged. I'm a fiancé WOW! and honestly this man has shown me nothing but love since the day I met him, he always go out of his way to make me feel like a princess, and although I know that marriage isn't always going to be roses and cuddles, I'm excited to share my future with him. Xx  :)

Just Us. <3

MEXICO HOLIDAY!

Hello my lovelies!

Let me start off by saying welcome back to my blog! I feel like its been a while since I've really been consistent with my blog posts. Between my styling job and just living life I needed a bit of a hiatus to concentrate on what I was doing and some time to reflect. In September my Mr and I decided to travel to the beautiful country of Mexico where we stayed in the authentic city of Puerto Vallarta on the Pacific Coast.

The 33 degree weather and endless green landscapes of nature were absolutely breathtaking, the food was delicious and our stay was jam packed with excursions, exploring and lots of late night entertainment. Check out my vlog below too see everything my Mr and I got up to.

We went to a famous part of Peurto Vallarta called the 'Malecon' which is Spanish for the 'Boardwalk' which had all of the clubs, bars, restaurants and lots of interesting market stalls selling everything from clothing, jewellery and paintings done with coffee beans.

My absolute favourite part of our holiday was visiting a private island one hour away from our hotel by speed boat called 'Las Caletas' - it was amazing! I sat in a hammock, went in the sea, drank from a coconut, fed a sea lion, held a monkey and kissed a parrot! Be warned you will see some insects and lizards that you have never seen before, and you WILL put on weight when you go to Mexico because the food is just incredible.

We also had the pleasure of seeing a theatre performance called 'Rhythms Of The Night', think fire breathing, over sized costumes, acrobats, singers dancers and contortionists with lots of lights and colour, IT WAS AWSOME! And to end the night we had a candle lit dinner in the middle of a warm thunder storm in a thatched restaurant whilst one of the entertainers played the guitar and sang - honestly it is probably the most romantic dinner I've ever had.

Our second to last day was spent doing an active adventure tour where we abseiled down the side of water falls and zip lined across a rainforest, I scared out of my mind but I'm glad I challenged myself and did it, and I'm happy I did because it was so much fun. The journey to the adventure tour was a great eye opener to see authentic Mexico and how people live, from fishing villages to people living in the hills.

Over all I had the most amazing holiday in Mexico, words cannot describe how happy I felt when I was there, and I got to experience it with the person that makes me the happiest :)